


Manual Projection

by violue



Series: The Spirit of Lawrence High Verse [5]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Astral Projection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-17
Updated: 2015-10-17
Packaged: 2018-04-26 18:21:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5015254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violue/pseuds/violue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam is moping around the house, and Dean knows just the thing to distract him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Manual Projection

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by [Casfucker](http://casfucker.tumblr.com), so all mistakes belong to her and you should go leave a flaming bag of dog poop on her front porch if you find any.

Dean’s routine changes a little. He’s still at home most of the day(though it’s summer, so Sam’s there too), still reads a lot, still sleeps a good ten hours at night. But once a week he picks a cooking class from The Merc’s website to attend, and his parents happily pay. He doesn’t really socialize, but exposure to groups of people is still good. He gets better at cooking, starts making more dinners for his family, starts feeling useful. His friends are back in town, and he gets to spend a good amount of time with them. Castiel hasn’t met them, though. He kept making excuses to get out of meeting them before finally admitting it was an insecurity thing he was trying to get past. Dean hasn’t pushed the issue, but he hates the thought that Castiel feels insecure about anything.

He gets to see Castiel a decent amount, though. Sometimes Castiel will bike over after work so they can spend a few hours together, and more often than not his days off are spent in Dean’s room, lounging on the memory foam bed like a spoiled cat while Dean cooks lunch.

And maybe once in a while Dean goes to sleep and involuntarily projects his astral body into Castiel’s bedroom.

Sam’s been mopey. His girlfriend’s family moved two towns over, and Lenore thought she was too young for a long-distance boyfriend. It’s been two weeks since the break-up, and every time Dean goes to fetch Sam for a meal he’s sprawled out in his bed, staring at the ceiling and listening to Sarah McLachlan. Sometimes, Sam is singing along. The kid is in need of a distraction.

Against his better judgment, Dean decides to give him one.

They’re eating lunch together in the dining room; Dean trotted out the cuban sandwich recipe he learned at The Merc last week. The sandwiches are good, Dean _knows_ they’re good, but Sam’s barely nibbling at his like a depressed chipmunk.

“So, uh… I traveled last night,” Dean says casually.

Sam perks up immediately. Dean’s weird spirit shit is a source of endless fascination for him. They have about a million different names for what Dean does, but most of the time they refer to it as Dean projecting, or “traveling”.

“Yeah? Cas’ again?” Sam asks, taking a real bite of his sandwich.

Dean fights a smile. “Yeah.” It’s _always_ Castiel’s. Not once has Dean projected and gone anywhere other than straight to him.

“Anything interesting happen?”

Alright, time to get Sam hooked. Dean was _going_ to keep this to himself so Sam didn’t start studying him again and wanting to watch him sleep, but… “I closed his door.”

Sam pauses, about to take another bite of his sandwich. “Was he… touching it too?”

“No, he was on his bed. He was whining that he forgot to close his door, and he didn’t want to get back up… and I was jokingly pushing it closed, but my hand actually touched the door and pushed it closed.”

“Holy crap!”

Dean shrugs. “I tried to touch it again, and my hand went right through it like it usually does. I even tried to touch other stuff, but it didn’t work unless Cas was touching it too, just like normal.” Like normal. What a weird thing to say about having an astral form.

“I still don’t get that, how you can touch him… or things he touches.”

“Yeah, Sammy… I’ve gathered.”

Sam always has a wide variety of questions on that subject that Dean has no answers for.

“ _Why don’t you ever fall through the floor when Cas isn’t touching it?”_

“ _What if Cas is on the bed, then you sit on the bed, then Cas gets up, do you fall through the bed?”_

“ _If Cas fed you a piece of food from his hand, would you digest it? Would it just disappear?”_

“ _If you had your arm halfway through the wall, and then Cas touched the wall, would your arm get stuck?”_

“ _Can your astral body fly, Dean?”_

Sam scarfs down another bite of his sandwich, looking at Dean with bright eyes. “Wow, you haven’t done something like this since your coma ended!”

“Yeah, I figured you’d probably want to uh… write it in your uh… Dean Ghost Stuff binder.”

“Yeah, yeah! Totally!”

  
  


***

  
  


Sam’s excited and full of energy for all of an hour before he disappears into his room again, and the Sarah McLachlan CD starts up.

  
  


***

  
  


“Heartbreak is a tough creature to deal with.”

Dean rolls his eyes at Castiel, turning his attention to the pot of chili he has simmering on the stove. “Dude, I’m your first boyfriend, when did your heart get broken?”

Castiel’s reply comes out soft, timid. Sad. “I spent four months missing you every hour of every day, not knowing if I’d ever speak to you again, mourning what we’d had.”

Dean’s hand stalls in stirring the chili. Holy shit, he’s such an asshole. “Fuck, Cas, I wasn’t thinking.”

“It’s fine. I… I know what you meant. I’ve never had someone break up with me.”

Dean hangs his head, feeling ashamed. “I’m sorry. What I said was thoughtless, and… God, what’s that word my therapist used last month… _diminishing._ I didn’t mean to diminish your painful memories, Cas.”

“Thank you for saying that, Dean.”

Dean nods awkwardly, returning again to his stirring and melting slightly when two arms wrap around him from behind. “My heart was broken too… in those months I couldn’t remember you. I just didn’t know why.”

“Love you, Dean,” Castiel murmurs. His fingers trail down Dean’s sides, and Dean’s about to get really excited… and then the fingers start tickling him.

“Gah! Damn it, Cas!”

  
  


***

  
  


Later, after Dean’s fed his family and Castiel has gone home, Dean wanders into Sam’s room. Sam is flopped over on his stomach on his bed, and that damn Best of Sarah McLachLan CD is playing again.

“Hey, Sammy,” Dean says, turning down the dusty old CD player. Sam groans into his pillow. “Whatcha doin?”

Sam turns his head so he can answer. “ _Dying._ What do you want?”

“Nothing, I guess. You missed dinner. Mom, Dad, Cas, and I were all gracious enough to save you some chili and cornbread, though.”

“Maybe later.”

“It came out pretty damn tasty if I do say so myself.”

“ _Everything_ you make comes out tasty, Dean.” It’s said with derision, yet it’s a compliment. Sam’s just a cornucopia of mixed emotions today.

Time to give him something to focus on again. “Wanna go see a movie?”

“Would I have to get out of bed?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Then no.”

Alright, he’s got his opening, now to casually drop the idea. “It’s too bad I can’t control this whole astral projection thing. I could just teleport myself to the theater, then I wouldn’t need a ride. And I could watch for free!”

Sam rolls onto his back, grunting with the effort. “Have you ever tried?”

“Tried what?” Dean says, like he’s not going out of his way to lead Sam into this conversation.

“Doing it on purpose. Have you ever _tried_ to project?”

“Nah.”

That much is true. It happens or it doesn’t happen, but Dean’s never tried to _make it_ happen, he wouldn’t know how. But he thinks this subject is just the thing to provide a new distraction from Lenore.

“You should,” Sam says, sitting up.

Okay, Dean’s gotta be aloof, make Sam pursue this. “Dude, I was just kidding about seeing movies for free.”

“Yeah, but think about it! If you could _control it,_ who knows what you could do! You could visit France! Or the White House! The summit of Mount Everest!”

Alright, Sam’s thinking on a much, much grander scale than Dean. “I don’t know if that would uh… I mean this thing seems kind of tied to Cas.”

“If that’s true, then you could go where he goes when you want. You could astrally audit his classes and go to college for _free_!” Sam sounds like he thinks Dean should find that appealing.

“Dude, how would I get a degree if no one knew I was there?”

“Okay but still, there are _possibilities._ Maybe if you learn how to make it happen, it’ll stop happening on accident.”

That might be nice. The other day Dean fell asleep, astrally projected to Castiel… who was in the bathroom peeing. It was… unfortunate. Also hilarious. Castiel couldn’t look Dean in the eye for the entire time he was there.

“So… how would I go about _trying_?”

Sam’s enthusiasm dies a little, and he frowns. “I don’t, uh… huh.” He looks off into the distance, the giant hamster wheel in his brain obviously spinning away. “Just like… close your eyes and… try?”

Dean closes his eyes and suddenly Sam is out of the bed and slapping him on the arm.

“Are you nuts?!” Sam yells.

“You _just_ said—”

“Dean, when you project you go into a deep, deep sleep. If you try to do it while standing up and _succeed,_ you’ll drop like a sack of bricks and crack your head open on my desk or something!”

“Oh. Good call.”

  
  


***

  
  


They relocate to Dean’s room and Sam gets Dean to assume a sort of meditative pose while leaning against the headboard.

“I am a leaf on the wind,” Dean says, resting his arms on his crossed legs, “watch how I soar.”

“That’s a good mantra, where’d you learn that?”

Dean slumps. “ _Firefly,_ Sam, haven’t you seen Firefly?”

“Oh is that the old space western with the guy from Castle?”

Dean groans. “Let’s just do this.”

Sam sits at the foot of the bed, binder at the ready. “Okay, well I think you should definitely be as relaxed as possible. Are you relaxed?”

“I feel pretty relaxed.”

“Alright, so… close your eyes.”

Dean closes his eyes.

“Now remember the goal is to trigger the projection _without_ entering your usual sleep cycles, so you shouldn’t be trying to fall _asleep_ exactly,” Sam says matter-of-factly.

“Uh… okay.”

“So breathe in slow and deep for about four seconds, then hold it for four seconds, then let the breath out for four seconds, set up a rhythm.”

Dean opens his eyes. “What?”

“Like this. In… two… three… four,” Sam says, then takes a deep breath. He pauses for about four seconds, then lets it out slowly. “Then out… two… three… four.”

Sure. Dean can do that. He closes his eyes again.

_Breathe in… two… three… four…_

_Hold… two… three… four…_

_Breathe out… two… three… four…_

_Breathe in… two… three… four…_

_Hold… two… three… four…_

_Breathe out… two… three… four…_

  
  


“Now picture Cas,” Sam says gently.

  
  


_Breathe in… two… three… four…_

_Hold… two… three… four…_

_Breathe out… two… three… four…_

  
  


“Picture every detail about him.”

  
  


_Breathe in… two… three… four…_

_Hold… two… three… four…_

_Breathe out… two… three… four…_

  
  


“His laugh.”

  
  


_Breathe in… two… three… four…_

_Hold… two… three… four…_

_Breathe out… two… three… four…_

  
  


“The way you feel when you’re with him.”

  
  


_Breathe in… two… three… four…_

_Hold… two… three… four…_

_Breathe out… two… three… four…_

  
  


“Picture going to him right now.”

  
  


_In… two… three… four…_

  
  


“And then… go.”

  
  


_Out… two… three… four…_

  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


“Dean!”

Dean’s eyes pop open and he looks around, surprised. He’s sitting next to Castiel on Castiel’s couch. He can hear Sam’s muffled “holy shit, it worked!” next to his body as he turns to smirk at Castiel.

“Hey, baby.”

Castiel looks around, making sure they’re alone, probably. “You’re either sleeping kind of early, or napping kind of late.”

“None of the above. Doing kind of a uh… meditation thing.”

Castiel reaches out and grabs the remote, switching off the documentary he was watching. “Really?That’s very interesting.”

“Got here on my first try!”

“I’m so glad you’re here,” Castiel says, smiling.

Dean grins. “Yeah?”

“Yes,” Castiel says, swinging his socked feet into Dean’s lap. “My chain broke and I had to walk my bike all the way home, and my feet are sore. You should rub them for me.”

  
  


***

  
  


Dean’s there for about half an hour before Sam’s voice sounds off near his body, telling him it’s time to try returning.

He tries, using the same meditation and visualization he used to leave his body in the first place, but nothing happens. He tries for half an hour, while Castiel texts updates to Sam, but it just doesn’t work. Eventually he gives up and watches some documentary about bees with Castiel.

One thing Dean’s discovered over the past weeks is that his astral body gets tired. He usually lasts ninety minutes to two hours, and then his astral body falls asleep and vanishes according to Castiel, returns to his physical body according to Sam, and then Dean enters normal sleep cycles.

That still holds true with this visit. Dean’s with Castiel another forty minutes before he starts feeling tired, then he’s cuddling close to his boyfriend, muttering a “goodnight” as he closes his eyes.

  
  


***

  
  


“Dean, wakey wakey!”

Dean wakes to the feel of his _annoying_ little brother shaking him awake. He’s still sitting with his legs crossed, though he’s slumped to the side some. He yawns, stretching his arms over his head and unfolding his legs.

“Wow, I don’t feel rested at _all_ ,” he grouses.

“That’s because I woke you up when you got back into regular sleep mode. It’s not even eleven yet.”

Dean turns his head, looking over at his alarm clock. “Oh.”

“So, visualizing your home and body didn’t work.”

“No, but the leaving my home and body part worked, which I think is pretty damn good for my first try.”

“I think next time we do this you should text Cas first. I’m sure at this point he kind of expects you to show up at bedtime, but…”

Dean shrugs. “Cas said he doesn’t mind me popping by. He just hopes I never show up while he’s in the bathroom again.”

Sam snorts. “Well, that’s good.” He frowns, staring down at the bedspread. “Wow, you guys are like… really close, huh. That’s cool. It’s sweet that you want to spend time together.”

Oh Christ, he’s thinking about Lenore again. “Please don’t start listening to that Sarah McLachlan CD again,” Dean begs.

Sam glares.

  
  


***

  
  


They do a few more experiments over the next few days, and after startling Castiel at work so badly that he breaks a massive jar of pickled eggs, Dean starts sending a text beforehand.

He remains unable to return without first tiring out his astral body, so he has to make sure he has nothing planned for at least two hours before he goes messing around with that.

A few times he tries to go elsewhere. The Roadhouse, the high school, Sam’s room, Castiel’s house while Castiel is at work, but nothing happens. He tries visiting specific people, too. Sam, Bobby, his parents, Jo, but nothing. Dean’s totally baffled by it, and God damn Sam keeps making cracks about how Dean and Castiel must be soul mates, while Castiel says maybe he just possesses a frequency that Dean is tuned into… whatever the hell that means. It _sounds_ smart, but for all Dean knows, Castiel is just bullshitting.

Right now it’s a balmy Thursday in July, and Dean’s just spent four hours playing Soul Calibur with Charlie, Ash, and Garth at Garth’s house. It’s been good to see them, especially with all the… developments in Dean’s life lately. Between seeing his friends and the weekly classes at The Merc, Dean’s feeling a lot better about being around people. Ellen’s even going to let Dean start bussing tables and washing dishes once her summer hires are back in school.

Dean’s phone pings with a text about twenty minutes after Garth drops him off at home. It’s from Castiel.

**RECEIVED 5:19pm** \- Come to the store, I’m lonely.

**SENT 5:20pm** \- Cant. :( My ride’s at the movies with his buddies.

**RECEIVED 5:23pm** \- That’s never stopped you before. :)

Dean grins.

**SENT 5:23pm** \- Be right there.

Dean goes to his room and crawls into bed, sprawling out on his back and closing his eyes. All he has to do is think of Castiel, and breathe.

  
  


_In… two… three… four…_

_Hold… two… three… four..._

_And out… two… three… four…_

  
  


END

 


End file.
